Bloggle

Q says:
so
what are you doing for the next hour?
I am going to see how long I can go without blinking
I won't last
I like to blink

Triple Word Score says:
i am playing scrabble in facebook
with adriana

Q says:
enjoy it while you can
Scrabble is pissed

Triple Word Score says:
i know
scrabble has been making hang up calls to my house

Q says:
Scrabble has been driving by your office cuz it was "in the neighborhood"

Triple Word Score says:
scrabble has been checking me out on zabasearch

Q says:
Scrabble stalks your Myspace page

Triple Word Score says:
Scrabble put sugar in my gas tank

Q says:
(that one made me seriously LOL)
Scrabble threw a brick with a note attached through your window

Triple Word Score says:
scrabble stole credit card offers out of my mailbox and now i'm 50K in debt

Q says:
Scrabble photoshopped itself into pictures with you and put them on Friendster

Triple Word Score says:
lolol
(blog)

Q says:
yah

Scienblogogy

Nicole Kidman says:
good morning
what the fuck is an SP
espy?
esspee?

Mimi Rogers says:
well
I did some research
and
I think it means
Sane person
no

Nicole Kidman says:
lolol
what does S P stand for?

Mimi Rogers says:
Suck Penis
no

Nicole Kidman says:
lolololol

Mimi Rogers says:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suppressive_Person
I wikied that shit up

Nicole Kidman says:
i need you to promise me something
this is very serious

Mimi Rogers says::
ok
anything

Nicole Kidman says:
if i am ever in a car accident, with my neck broken
and blood everywhere
limbs cut off, that kind of thing
call Tom Cruise
cause I'll need someone to laugh at
to take my mind off the pain

Mimi Rogers says:
listen
you are eiather on board or you are taking a vacation and romping, you know cuz it is just ~deep sigh~ it is what I do, I help people I am here to ~INSANE CACKLE~ you know?

Nicole Kidman says:
he is the AUTHORITY

Mimi Rogers says:
he is the authority on being insane

Nicole Kidman says:
lololol

Mimi Rogers says:
seriously
I think he is mentally ill

Nicole Kidman says:
intensely

Mimi Rogers says:
am I being glib, Matt?

Nicole Kidman says:
lolol
he studied

Mimi Rogers says:
I am worried for Katie Holmes

Nicole Kidman says:
i'm not
stupid twit

Mimi Rogers says:
exactly
she is dumb

Nicole Kidman says:
don't think this wasn't a career move

Mimi Rogers says:
yeah, I guess
but I still think she is married to a crazy person

Nicole Kidman says:
i think she chose it
what else was going to keep her in the public eye better than marriage to a wacko?

Mimi Rogers says:
I guess
but
has it gotten her better roles?
or is she just happy to be wandering around in bathrobes looking stoned?
maybe she is

Nicole Kidman says:
lolol
i think tom should help britney
and
i think his eyeballs could fry people with their crazy intensity

Mimi Rogers says:
his eyes are set to "stun thetans"

Nicole Kidman says:
lolol

Mimi Rogers says:
dude is fucked up
(did we blog)?
Scienblogogy?

Nicole Kidman says:
ok
you be Mimi Rogers
I'll be Nicole Kidman

Mimi Rogers says:
lolol

Random Celebriblog

TMZ says:
you should call me
i sound husky

Perez Hilton says:
you sound like Kathleen Turner?

TMZ says:
yep
weird accent and all

Perez Hilton says:
with that teeth clicking?

TMZ says:
i can't manage that

Perez Hilton says:
where the hell is she from anyway?

TMZ says:
she changes it everytime she's asked

Perez Hilton says:
she is from Middle earth

TMZ says:
she's a hobbit?
or an orc?
ok listen
wikipedia says she was born in missouri
but
her dad was a missionary or something
and she grew up in Canada, Cuba, Venezuela, and the United Kingdom

Perez Hilton says:
well
that explains that

TMZ says:
this is what she said about herself
"on a night when I feel really good about myself, I can walk into a room, and if a man doesn't look at me he's probably gay."
holy crap
she has rheumatoid arthritis
poor thing
that shit hurts

Perez Hilton says:
I bet it does
you know what is the best part of wikipedia
the fights on the discussion page

TMZ says:
oh
i never look at those

Perez Hilton says:
people are very serious about wiki accuracy
on all kinds of subjects
the best are Lord of the Rings, Star trek and the Beatles
do not get shit wrong
or you will be chased off of the wiki forever
shunned

TMZ says:
lololol

Perez Hilton says:
"You fucking moron!! Paul played drums on Back in the USSR and it was a Thursday session NOT a Wednesday!!!!"
good stuff

TMZ says:
lololol

Perez Hilton says::
are there fights about Kathleen Turner?

TMZ says:
i was watching a BBC show called Top Gear yesterday

Perez Hilton says::
I know that show

TMZ says:
and the host was talking about roadie-ing for The Who
and he said "little known fact - Zac Starkey who, unlike his father, plays the drums,......(something i couldn't remember cause I was laughing so hard)"

Perez Hilton says:
hahaha

TMZ says:
but then i turned the channel cause it was just a bunch of boys standing around a car going "this one goes fast" "no this one goes faster" "i have a new fuel pump"
boring

Perez Hilton says:
yah
I can't watch that show

TMZ says:
me neither
it's dumb

Perez Hilton says:
I saw some of Ringos "story tellers
and I thought
really?
Ringo gets a storytellers?
I had to turn away
because he looked like someone's dad went shopping at Hot Topic

TMZ says:
lololol

Perez Hilton says::
and he talked about all these songs I have never heard of and were terrible
and he is a bad singer
I felt bad for him

TMZ says:
it's hard to feel sorry for someone who could build his 20,000 sq. ft. house entirely out of wadded up $100,000 bills, set fire to it and still be unimaginably wealthy

Perez Hilton says:
haha

TMZ says:
it's called perspective, baby

Advice Blog

Smelly & Festive in New York says:
so
I am having a dilemma
I have to go to a friend's moving to LA party tonight
in the city
so I don't want to go all the way home after work
but
I need to bring home my "gym" stuff to wash
but
I don't want to bring it to the party
cuz that is gross
so
how do I get my gym stuff home without going home?
Fedex?
put it in a cab?
please help

Dear Scabby says:
hi
this is what you do
leave the gym stuff at work
bring new gym stuff on monday
bring all the gym stuff home monday night
or
does your gym rent lockers?
go buy a lock
and stuff your bag in a locker
and
after the party
get a cab to the locker

Smelly & Festive in New York says:
both are good ideas
I have a lock

Dear Scabby says:
pick up the bag
then take the subway home
and
while you are on the subway, unpack your bag, walk around the car and ask people if they want to smell your shorts
stand right in front of them
stretch out your arm with the shorts
and say
"c'mon
it smells like pumpkins
who doesn't like pumpkins?"
do it

Smelly & Festive in New York says:
what would I do without you and your great ideas

Dear Scabby says:
i don't know

Boner Gets My Vote

Corky says:
good morning
my voice is scratchy

John Holmes says:
good morning
are you sick?
or are you Stevie Nicks?

Corky says:
i have a cold
i think the fact that the weather has swung from 2 degrees to 62 degrees in 2 days has something to do with it

John Holmes says:
yup
I had to check my calendar today
January 8
going up to 65 degrees today

Corky says:
me too
it's supposed to hit 62 today

John Holmes says:
did I move to North Carolina?

Corky says:
florida

John Holmes says:
oh
nobody told me I was moving
oh well
better get a bathing suit

Corky says:
yep
are you at the gym?

John Holmes says:
yes
I am on the ab bench
is it a bench?
or a board?

Corky says:
smoking a cigarette
it is a bench

John Holmes says:
lol
yes
I am on the ab bench
smoking
drinking bourbon
hitting on the cute trainer

Corky says:
don't forget to pop a few pills

John Holmes says:
~pops viagras~

Corky says:
good girl

John Holmes says:
thanks
now I will have a boner all day

Corky says:
ouchy

John Holmes says:
boner might be the funniest word of all time

Corky says:
i'm not sure
retard is pretty funny
your boner is retarded

John Holmes says:
that is the funniest phrase of all time
retard is mean
boner isn't mean
just funny
boner gets my vote
which something I have never said before

Corky says:
you've said it
i've heard you say it

John Holmes says:
"boner gets my vote"?
I have said that?

Corky says:
i have heard you say it to subway attendants when you have problems with your metrocard

John Holmes says:
lolol

Corky says:
i have heard you say that to waitresses who do a good job

John Holmes says:
I'm definitely going to start

Corky says:
i heard you say that to the owner of a bodega who tried to sell you Playgirl

John Holmes says:
I am going to say it to everyone I am praising from now on

Corky says:
i think you should

John Holmes says:
Mom, Thankgsgiving dinner was delicious
boner gets my vote

Corky says:
"secretary - thanks for collating that report. Boner gets my vote!"

John Holmes says:
yep
once again...
we are changing the culture for the better

Corky says:
paradigm shifters, that's us

John Holmes says:
yup

Corky says:
you need to 'boner gets my vote' US

John Holmes says:
put it at the bottom of the blog
where it says "ediots"

Blognasium

Richard Simmons says:
I have a meeting in 20 minutes

Tony Little says:
i will miss you!

Richard Simmons says:
It should be about an hourish

Tony Little says:
ok
i'll be here!

Richard Simmons says:
then
I will go to the gym
I joined a gym
but

Tony Little says:
you did?
you don't need to

Richard Simmons says:
I'm not really a gym gal
so it is weird
I was feeling a little 'holiday'
so
I joined up

Tony Little says:
i had a spin class wednesday night - my cooch feels bruised

Richard Simmons says:
and
the gym is weird

Tony Little says:
yah

Richard Simmons says:
oh yeah, the old bike cooch bruise

Tony Little says:
it was a good class tho
i sweated buckets
it was all black hole of calutta-y

Richard Simmons says:
yeah, spinning is hard core
I got a tour of my new gym
by one of those gym people
those people are too excited about gyms
she scared me

Tony Little says:
lolol
was she on coke?

Richard Simmons says:
she asked if I was "into spinning"
I was confused at first
then I realized she meant the bike thing

Tony Little says:
lolololol
i like spinning around and around and then losing my balance and plopping down

Richard Simmons says:
I shook my head and said "I'm not really a team player"

Tony Little says:
lololololol

Richard Simmons says:
she was like "ok!"
too excited
about my lack of enthusiasm
it was weird
and also
my body is a little freaked by the activity
I felt fluish last night
but
I think is my body cleaning the crap out

Tony Little says:
yah
my body definitely felt all shoken up after the spin class
like things were scraped from the walls on the inside

Richard Simmons says:
exactly

Tony Little says:
things got circulating around

Richard Simmons says:
itchy
on the inside

Tony Little says:
yup
i loved it
i wanna do it again

Richard Simmons says:
you should

Tony Little says:
monday and wednesday nights!

Richard Simmons says:
maybe I'll join the spin class after all

Tony Little says:
it hurts
pretty bad
my quads felt like they were going to snap off the next day

Richard Simmons says:
cooch

Tony Little says:
do yourself a favor and wear bike pants

Richard Simmons says:
ok

Tony Little says:
don't wear something loose that can bunch up in your cooch

Richard Simmons says:
right

Tony Little says:
i learned that the hard way

Richard Simmons says:
the old bike cooch bunch
also
I have been going at lunch
so
I need to shower after
and
I have issues
with public showering

Tony Little says:
so you won't be back until 5pm?

Richard Simmons says:
right

Tony Little says:
k

Richard Simmons says:
no
I go for under an hour
I'm easiing in
easiiiiiing

Tony Little says:
lolol
good for you1
!

Richard Simmons says:
good for you2
too

Tony Little says:
ol
l